10 Ignorant Mindset Of Some Ladies Towards Marriage

I will be as blunt as i can in addressing these ignorant notions some Nigerian ladies have towards marriage.

1.Being too careful about her choice of man:

OK I understand you are the type that is so scared of venturing into marriage so you want to be very careful in choosing that man you will likely spend your life with..but I'm sorry to be the carrier of BAD NEWS..."No matter how careful you may be,every marriage is filled with uncertainties...even if you marry an angel,he could turn to a demon so just take the risk and be ready to confront any uncertainty you find else you may remain scared and single for a very long time.
Infact the more careful you are the greater the possibility of making a mistake.

2.I want a man who will love me for real:

I'm very vast in English language but when it comes to this sentence,the more I try to understand the more confused I get..."love you for real" like seriously!

You better get this fact now,if loving you for real means loving you with your imperfections then i might agree to an extent else...NO MAN CAN LOVE YOU FOR REAL except that real is substituted for many things like love you for your curves,intelligence,manners.....so stop using this ackward sentence and try to develop something a man can desire you for...no man wants a woman for nothing.

3.Wanting a made guy or financially OK guy:

I honestly have nothing against this except the fact that being financially OK is relative and we don't ever get to know the definition of "being financially ok"

But then I kinda wonder why ladies fail to understand that most guys in their late 20s and early 30s are still trying to find their feet which means a lady who wants a made guy is inadventedly saying she wants a married man or sugar daddy because most made men in Nigeria are in their mid or late 30s and in their 40s and would have been married.

However,the few younger ones who are made can not have more than one wife.

Ladies should try to be financially independent so that they can be disciplined enough to start a life with a guy rather than struggling with several ladies to be with a "made" guy or ending up as a side chic of a made guy.

4.I can not suffer with a man because he could dump me latter:

This is one of the dumbest notion many Naija ladies have and anytime I hear a lady says this I just give her that stupid look of a looser.

Are you doing any guy a favor by dating him when he is broke? For Petes sake you have every right to walk away from any affair if you dim fit and staying with a struggling guy is your choice and not a favor. ..if he latter becomes rich and he dumps you,just walk away rather than use those words to blackmail him.

5.My wedding will be the talk of the town:

I totally agree that a grand wedding is the dream of most ladies and I also share in this dream but the question is this; "Is it a do or die to have a grand wedding"?
What is wrong in having an intro and registry wedding and latter plan for the grand one when the funds are there?

Don't be deceived. ..8 out of 10 grand weddings in Nigeria are sponsored.

I think this is one area many ladies are destroying their lives because a guy will do you like a wife and enjoy all the wify benefit while telling you he is not ready for a grand wedding and you will continue to foolishly play along until he dumps your overused ass for a younger lady when he is finally ready...biko receive sense.

6.GOD has not confirmed him or my Pastor said he is not the one:

Like seriously! OK get this straight. ..it is good to listen to the word of GOD or to follow your pastor's advice but hello! when it comes to choosing a spouse GOD has clearly made it our duty to look for a spouse and he will gladly give us his favor ...Proverbs 18:22:
"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD".

The best you can do is to pray to God that a good guy finds you and when next a prophet or pastor tells you a certain guy is not for you...simply ask him with humility to tell you who your man is..his name,house address,complexion....

7.I can't marry a man I have no feelings for:

Your feeling is very important when choosing a man but pray he also has feelings for you else you will end up in tears no matter how deep your feelings for him is.

This is a hard nut for many ladies but the sincere fact is that your feelings is not as important as the guy's feeling towards you.

Getting married to a man may be hinged on your feelings but staying married to him is primarily dependent on how he feels towards you.

8.Marriage is a beautiful and wonderful institution:

I'm so sorry to tell you another bad news...."marriage is very turbulent and you will feel like running out"

At the intial stage it will seem like its so beautiful and made in heaven but that is the initial gragra stage. But when the reality stage sets in you will come to know the true picture of marriage but the good news is that you can make yours always beautiful if you can learn to tolerate, forgive,forgive and forgive because only two forgivers can make a beautiful marriage.

9.If my husband truly loves me,he will never cheat on me:

I know this issue is over-flogged and many ladies will never agree to this fact..."YOUR HUSBAND CAN HAVE EYES FOR ONLY YOU AND IN FACT COMMIT SUICIDE IF YOU LEAVE HIM YET CAN STILL CHEAT ON YOU"...sounds stupid I guess but that is just the truth..

Just warn your husband that if he must do let him go far far away from you and must use protection...I always say...only a foolish lady will hinge her marital happiness on her husband's sexual faithfulness to her.

I'm not supporting philandering but this is just how the cookie crumbles.

10.I want a tall cute rich romantic sexy....

Habba sister just negodu there...only you one...please there is a difference between real life and Telemundo. .you can not have all you want in one man and if you think you have then kudos to you. Many ladies cheat on their hubbies or fiance because they can't help comparing...

culled from nairaland

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